[tall thin bloke]

DEAR LONELY MALE SURF DUDES
I OF COURSE AM NOT LONELY ......(NOT LONG TO GO ,ONCE A WEEK TREAT COMING UP!!MY BOIL IN THE BAG SHOULD BE READY ANY MINUTE ..YUMMY .COD IN PARSLEY SAUCE!)
BUT I EMPATHISE WITH OTHE..I MEAN THOSE SINGLE DUDES OUT THERE WHO ARE FORCED THROUGH SHEER BOREDOM TO GO OUT INTO COLD WATER AND RISK INFECTION FROM RAW SEWAGE , FOR HOURS AT A TIME ..PRETENDING TO LOVE SURFING WHEN THEY WOULD REALLY RATHER BE AT HOME ON THE SOFA WATCHING CASUALTY OR EMERDALE WITH A BEAUTIFUL LADY. SO TO HELP ALL THE POOR UNFOURTUNATE LADS WHO HAVE THE "GOOD FORTUNE! HEHEHE" TO BE ABLE TO SURF WHEN THEY CHOOSE .HERE IS A LITTLE PRESSIE!

CAPTURE THE IMAGE BELOW,CHANGE THE TEXT AND ADD YOUR OWN NAME ,YOU CAN EVEN ADD A "REAL NEWS STORY "UNDERNEATH IF YOU WANT THEN FLASH IT TO A CHICK....CHAT ABOUT RECOVERY TIMES ,PLASTIC SURGERY ,FEAR ...NIGHTMARES ARE GOOD(NEED COMFORT IN BED AT NIGHT AND ALL THAT RUBBISH).HEY PRESTO YOU HAVE SCORED AND YOU ARE A REAL LIFE HERO TO BOOT.

[Clifff]

Dear TTB,
Thanks to your advice I now have a Busty blonde girlfriend. I posted the above picture onto a 'Lonely hearts' web site with a few details about myself and within a few days my Hotmail Inbox was flooded with mails from Girls just oozing(Quite litterally) with simpathy.
I was so taken by the photo that she sent me of her that I actually hacked off my own leg so she'd believe the story. It hurt a little at first but hey, you can't feel what you don't have right.
We haven't actually met yet but by the E-mails, I know she's the one for me and by the picture I think you'll agree that she's any mans dream.
Getting around is a little difficult but once you get used to hopping it's actually quite a quick way to move. The doctors say that the infection will clear up in a few weeks and that I shouldn't have used my grandads rusty old saw. I hope it does, I wouldn't want to burst and make a mess on our first date.

Here's the picture she sent me, I think that might be her caravan to the right of the picture. That's the only thing I'm not keen on. Can't wait to meet her.
Thanks again for the help.

[tall thin bloke]

WOW CLIFF
GLAD TO KNOW IT WORKED FOR YOU .......I KEEP TRYING BUT ....HEY .WELL ALL GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO KEEP ON , WEEK IN WEEK OUT ,TRYING THEIR LUCK AND WHO KNOWS PERHAPS IT WILL SOON BE MY TUR......I MEAN (COUGH ,SWALLOW NERVOUSLY) MY MATES TURN ....SOON .

THIS BIRD LOOKS FAMILIAR THOUGH................REMINDS OF ...A BEACH ON TV.ERM..........WHO DOES IT LOOK LIKE?THATS RIGHT DAVID HASSELLBANK, YOU KNOW WHO PLAYS FOR LEEDS AND SOMETIMES IS ON BAYWAN....WATCH I MEAN

ITS A SHAME ABOUT THE SHOES THOUGH.............POOR LASS FANCY HAVING CLUB FEET AND **** THAT BIG TO OVER BALANCE HER AT THE SAME TIME ........IS'NT LIFE UNFAIR .NATURE HAS SURELY DELIVERED A CRUEL BLOW TO THAT YOUNG THING ,SHE REMINDS ME OF MY FAVOURITE MEMBER OF ABBA , NOW WHAT WAS THE BLONDES NAME?.................WAS IT BJORN OR BENNIE ?AH WELL NEVER MIND .

LATER DUDE

[tall thin bloke]

CLIFF
IS SHE VERY VERY SMALL OR IS THAT ONE MOTHER OF A FRIDGE SHES STANDING NEXT TO?

[sweethang23]

Well, Tall thin blokey, although I think that this is a bad example of how to attract the chicks I have to admit that yes being as gullable as me I clicked striaght on that pic and felt terrible for you! Well until I read you plan of sympathy, so Tall thin bloky I do hope that your not attcked by a great white or any ladies that are lurking in the whitewash!!lol

[Kattitude_Kat]

Dammit I tried the picture, went for the sympathy -

B***h ran off with the shark.

Life sucks.

Tony

[BABY_CHERRY]

VERY FUNNY BUT I DIDNT FALL FOR IT SUM 1 TRYED THAT PIC ON ME B4...LOL
LUV SARAH X